我不敢想象
Guest: "Why does your dog sit there and watch me eat?" Hotel Host: "I can't imagine, unless it's because you have the plate he usually eats from." 客人：“為什麼你的狗狗坐在那兒老是看著我吃東西呢?”旅館主人：“我不敢想象，除非是因為你拿了它經常用來吃東西的.盤子了。”
我不能說是哪一年
Palmist: The life line in your hand tells that you will die in a year. Customer: Good gracious! In a year? Palmist: Yes, but I can't say in which.手相大師：你手上的生命線顯示出你還有一年將會死去。顧客：天哪，一年後?手相大師：是的，可是我不能說是哪一年。
十塊糖
Mother asks her son, "Jim, if you have ten candies, and you eat four, then how many candies do you have?"
"Ten." Jim says.
"Ten?" Mother asks.
"Yes, Mum. Four candies are inmy stomach and six candies are out of my stomach. Fourand six is ten, isn't it right?"
媽媽問兒子：“吉姆，如果你有10塊糖，吃了4塊，那你還有幾塊糖?”
“10塊。”吉姆說。
“10塊?”媽媽問。
“是的，媽媽。因為4塊在我的肚子裡面，6塊在肚子外面，4加6等於10，不對嗎?”
如何致富
Little brother: I saw you kiss my elder sister, and if you don't give me a nickel I'll tell my father.
Sister's boyfriend: No, don't do that. Here's a nickel.
Little brother: That makes a buck and a quarter I've made this month.
弟弟：我看見你親我姐姐了，如果你不給我五分錢，我就告訴我爸。
姐姐的男朋友：不要那樣做。給你五分錢。
弟弟：我這個月已經賺了一塊兩毛五了
給我那個打贏的
Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. -- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. -- Well, bring me the winner then.服務員，這個龍蝦只有一隻爪。對不起，先生，這隻肯定打過架了。哦，那給我那個打贏的吧。