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簡短易懂的英語笑話

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A substitute teacher was trying to make use of her psychology background. She began her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, please stand up." Right away, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Why do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "I don’t, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"

簡短易懂的英語笑話

代課教師試圖運用她的心理學知識。開始上課時,她說:“誰覺得自己很愚蠢,請站起來。”小約翰馬上站起來了。老師問:“為什麼你覺得你很愚蠢呢,小約翰?”“我不覺得我很蠢,只是我不願意你一個人站在那!”

The phone rang in the obituary department of the local newspaper. "How much does it cost to have an obituary printed"? asked the woman. "It's five dollars a word, ma'am," the clerk replied politely. "Fine," said the woman after a moment. "Got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am." "Got some paper?" "Yes ma'am." "Okay, write this down: 'Cohen dead'." "That's all?" asked the clerk disbelievingly. "That's it." "I'm sorry ma'am, I should have told you - there's a five word minimum." "Yes, you should've," snapped the woman. Now let me think a minute... okay, got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am." "Got some paper?" "Yes, ma'am." "Okay, here goes: 'Cohen dead. Cadillac for Sale.'"

地方報社負責刊登死亡訃告的部門電話響了。“登一篇訃告多少錢?”一位女士問。“五美元一個字,太太。”書記員禮貌地回答。“好的,”女士沉默了一小會兒,“拿著筆呢嗎?”“是的,夫人。”“紙呢?”“是的,夫人。”“好的,這樣寫:‘科恩去世了’”“就這些了?”書記員疑惑地問道。“對,就這些。”“很抱歉,夫人,我剛才沒有告訴您,在我們這登訃告最少也得五個字。”“沒錯,你就應該告訴我,”女士有點生氣了,“現在我得考慮一下,嗯…拿著筆呢嗎?”“是的,夫人。”“紙呢?”“是的,夫人。”“好的,這樣寫:‘科恩去世了,出售一輛卡迪拉克轎車。’”

My personnel-management class consisted mainly of adult, working students. One night while discussing job enrichment, the teacher asked if any of us would be happy doing what we did that day for the rest of our lives. A student in the back raised his hand. Surprised, the teacher asked him, "What did you do today?" Smiling, he said, "I took off from work."

我曾參加過一個員工管理培訓課程,我們班上基本上都是成年人和一些半工半讀的學生。一天晚上我們在課上討論工作豐富化的問題。我們的老師問我們當中有沒有人願意一輩子做今天所做的.事情。坐在教室最後面的一個學生舉起了手。老師覺得很驚奇,於是問那個學生,“你今天做什麼來著?”,學生笑著回答,“我今天請假了”。

Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?" "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. My husband was in all morning. He never heard a thing!" After apologizing, I got her parcel. "Oh, good," she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages." "What is it?" I asked. "My husband's new hearing aid."

我在郵局上班,對於顧客們的各種情緒早已習以為常了。所以,有一天當一個生氣的顧客氣沖沖地來到我的工作臺時,我還是非常平靜地問她,“有什麼問題嗎?”“我早上上街了,”女顧客說,“我回到家的時候,我看到一個卡片,卡片說郵遞員要給我們家送包裹,但沒人在家。可是我的丈夫整個早上都在家啊。他說他什麼都沒聽到”。在表示了歉意之後,我把包裹給了她。“噢,太好了”,那位女顧客喜形於色。“我們等這東西都等多少年了!”“是什麼好東西?”我問。“我丈夫的新助聽器”。