英語典故可是很多老美都耳熟 ，下次換你去取笑老美的時候，就可以用到本站小編為您整理的英語小笑話了。
誰才是有色人種
Dear white, something you got to know
親愛的白種人，有幾件事你必須知道。
When I was born, I was black.
當我出生時，我是黑色的
When I grow up, I am black.
我長大了，我是黑色的
When I’m under the sun, I’m black.
我在陽光下，我是黑色的
When I’m cold, I’m black.
我寒冷時，我是黑色的
When I’m afraid, I’m black.
我害怕時，我是黑色的`
When I’m sick, I’m black.
我生病了，我是黑色的
When I die, I’m still black.
當我死了，我仍是黑色的。
you—white people,
你——白種人
When you were born, you were pink.
當你出生時，你是粉紅色的
When you grow up, you become white.
你長大了，變成白色的
You’re red under the sun.
你在陽光下，你是紅色的
You’re blue when you’re cold.
你寒冷時，你是青色的
You are yellow when you’re afraid.
你害怕時，你是黃色的
You’re green when you’re sick.
你生病時，你是綠色的
You’re gray when you die.
當你死時，你是灰色的
And you, call me color?
然後，你叫我“有色種人”?
錢不用找了
Selling secondhand books at our church bazaar, I got into an argument with a prospective customer. He was interested in buying The Pocket Book of Ogden Nash but claimed it was overpriced at 35 cents. Other paperbacks were selling for ten or 15 cents each.
在教堂的義賣市上賣舊書時，我與一名準備買東西的顧客發生了一場爭論。他對購買袖珍奧金.納什集頗感興趣，但是說它要三十五美分開價過高。其它的平裝書每本才賣十或十五美分。
I pointed out that the book was in good condition. Nash was a fun poet, and it was for a good cause. He said it was a matter of principle. Ultimately, I agreed to sell him the book for 15 cents. Triumphant, he paid with a $10 bill. "Keep the change," he said.
我指出這本書儲存狀況頗好，納什是個有趣的詩人，這個要價是合理的。他說這是個原則問題。最終，我同意以十五美分的價格將這本書賣給他。他得意洋洋，拿出一張十美元的票子付帳。“零錢不用找了。”他說。
咒語
An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.
一個男人找到一個巫婆，要求她解開一條困擾了自己40年的咒語。
The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."
巫婆說："或許我可以做的到，但你必須一字不落地告訴我下咒的時候說的那句咒語。"
The old man says without hesitation - "I now pronounce you man and wife."
男人毫不猶豫的答道：“‘我現在宣佈你們成為夫婦。’”
世界各地的蹩腳英語
①If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself。
日本旅館：如果您想調節您房間的溫度，請控制您自己。
②Please don't feed the animals. If you have any food, please give it to the guard on duty。
匈牙利動物園：請不要給動物餵食。如果您有食品，請餵給值班警衛。
③Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar。
挪威酒吧：女士們不要在酒吧裡生孩子。
④Fur coats made for ladies from their skins。
瑞典皮貨商店：為女士們製作的皮大衣，是用她們的皮製成的。
⑤Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists 。
香港牙科診所：由最新的衛理公會教徒給您拔牙。
⑥Drop your trousers here for best results。
泰國的乾洗店：在這裡脫掉您的褲子，等待最好的結果。
⑦Specialist in women and other diseases。
義大利婦科診所：我們是women和其他疾病的專家。
⑧Welcome to the cemetery where famous Russian artists are buried daily except Thursday。
俄國公墓：歡迎訪問這個公墓，許多著名的俄國藝術家每天埋在這裡，但星期四不埋。
⑨We take your bags and send them in all directions。
丹麥機場：我們將拿走您的行李，送往四面八方。
⑩The manager has personally passed all water served here。
墨西哥旅館：旅館經理將親自為您撒尿。
送出去還有的東西
What can Santa give away and still keep?
Answer: a cold.
什麼東西聖誕老人可以分送出去，自己卻也還留著?
答案：感冒。